Hola!

 This morning at 6am I get some labs taken ( by my nurse) because…… Day 14 of black box IV antibiotics and guess what? You know! Yup. Kidney infection. This thing is fighting to kill me. 

I see my surgeon on Wednesday. My last appointment was canceled for some reason that I can’t remember. I’m going to beg to get this surgery done in December even if I have to be in the hospital over Christmas. 

Besides that! We’ve been putting up decorations and had a great Thanksgiving! Great meal, lovely wine, I got to wear that gold velvet dress I bought from Anthropology last summer!! I told you that it would come in handy! It’s amazing and might have to be worn for some occasion coming up. I couldn’t stop petting my own arm :-)

Have I mentioned how I’m going to get away with wearing my sun dresses this winter? I bought a few cropped, colorful,  light sweaters to wear, a cropped Jean jacket with a boucle collar and a fedora. A couple of cute scarves and booties and sweater tights!!! Cold today, sunny in a few months!  Yes, me!

I was feeling a bit down the other day. I was home alone and when it’s quiet, sometimes, my brain starts to think think think. It’s different spending the holidays without speaking to my children, anyway, my husband brought home a four foot freaking Santa to cheer me up. THIS, my friends, is the way to my Cheesy little heart!!! 

Ok, have to run. I hope that you all had a lovely holiday and are looking forward to Christmas!

Luv,

Me

Tripping Down My Childhood Music

 And I fell into this!!! My God it’s so freaking weird how music can make you feel the age you were when it was popular! Twelve, by the way! I was twelve and JUST being allowed to listen to music on the radio! 

Home

 Home on IV antibiotics and sooo many pain meds. I’m a bit fuzzy around the edges! Last night I had to have my antibiotics administered while we were watching football and I closed my eyes as they were going in. I can feel the liquid go through my veins to my heart and if it’s to cold my heart aches, which was the case, and I woke up 8 hours later! Oops! I had a bad dream at one point and in the dream I was in a lot of pain and couldn’t speak well. I was trying to call out, Mom, I’m hurting!!! My muffled words and tossing head had both my son and my husband running out to help me. Both had been awakened by my “ yelling” out. Pain meds were administered and off I went. 

So happy that thanksgiving is nearly here! I love this time of year. I’m so happy!! I’m overdosing on Hallmark movies! We’re decorating this weekend! 

I’ve had to do make some “ artistic” changes to my book cover. The girl really looks like me. It’s strange to see this coming together!! Yay!

Tracy

Update:

 I’m still in the hospital. I had a picc line put in yesterday and , Dude! The guy was so rough! Yes, that line needs to go next to my heart through my arm but it does not need to his my liver too! He just kept jamming it in . The creepy part??? You can FEEL it go into your chest next to your heart. Gross!

So, that means, iv antibiotics at home with a nurse. Ah! The excitement!

The seizure…. Ok, had my brain checked out and it looks like what I had was…. A type of migraine- fainting thing. It’s caused by infected blood strolling through your brain, heart rate being goofy because of sepsis, anemia and… stress.  “You need to lower your stress. You just don’t know when the sepsis will lower your threshold”

Hold up! All I need to do is lower my stress? Well, shit! Why didn’t I think of that?

Ah, I love it when I’m told that.

Otherwise, I’m good. I’m in a good mood. Loving the cooler weather. We’re decorating soon. There aren’t any shorts in my brain waves, which a bonus! And I have people feeding me drugs and meals several times per day. What more can’t you ask for?

Cattails!

Me

Guess what?!

 I’m in the hospital……

I had a seizure so the husband fully NASCAR’ed me to the hospital. Turns out that I’m a genius, I still have sepsis and an even worse kidney infection and that can lower your threshold for neurological “ incidents”

Look at my upgrade!

On the good drugs.

Be back soon

Me

Bears

 

No Title.

 A little over two weeks of black box antibiotics and I’m still sick and in pain. Trying to stay positive!!! 

Other things have been going very well which makes me happy. It’s fall. That makes me happy! We’re going to put up our Christmas stuff this week and that too makes me happy!!

Here are some updates that are trying to drown me.

Can’t beat this infection and it’s sucking the life out of me.

I have acquired a new infection as well, because why limit them? And that has a way of trying to crush morale.

The 11th was my OM’s birthday. That was difficult. No contact. No birth story on here.

No grand babies.

I’ve had yet another doctor quit. Leaving practice. Is it me? Am I the drama? I don’t think I’m the drama. 😏

But, I made reservations at Ruth’s Chris for Thanksgiving. Holidays are gonna be different up in here now. What the husband and I like and want to do. A lot more me me me and a lot less jumping through hoops, walking on eggshells and much less stomach churning dread. Now THAT sounds like a holiday! That makes me happy.

Pickles:

 yes, you read that right. I have found my pickle heaven and I’m not gonna lie, this makes me crazy happy!

Let me explain….. There was a restaurant in the falls that bought their pickles from a food truck and they kept it a deep dark secret who this food truck was. I have literally driven to the Falls to buy these pickles. They are sweet pickles which I have ALWAYS  loathed! But there’s just something different…..

Restaurant closed and I have bought every brand of pickles in the known world….. Or had I?

So, I’m grocery shopping online through Amazon and Whole Foods when I type in pickles, because I’m like a dog with a bone, and there, before my eyes is Famous Dave’s pickles. I’m wracking my brain, like THEE Famous Dave’s? Have I ever eaten a pickle there? Nothing. My brain is in neutral. I decide that it can’t hurt to try, right?

They’re being delivered at 7 pm that night and I watch the clock, tick tick….

I get the message that they’re outside my door and I’m like a kid at Christmas. Could my hunt be over? Is this too much to hope for? Will I be broken into a million pickle craving pieces?

The husband says he will open the jar and get me one to try and……

The clouds opened up and a ray of sunlight fell onto the half of a pickle chip tucked between my fingers in all its sweet and spicy glory. Amen, thank you, Jesus. I can die now.

I finished the jar in two days. TWO.

I rush ordered two more jars. I am literally eating them, not with, but FOR, every meal. 10 pickle chips. They are nearly as crispy as the day that divine cucumber went into that jar!

IT TAKES NEARLY NOTHING TO MAKE ME HAPPY!!!!

Welp, there’s my adventure for the day. Wasn’t that a rollercoaster…. Of sorts….

Cattails to you!

Me

So…

 Last month I had a…. kidney infection….Obviously. And I was in so much pain. I had to put off going to the hospital because my doc had tried an antibiotic and you have to wait about four days from your last dose before you can get a urine sample to grow the bacteria. So Romantic!

On the 29th I woke up in excruciating pain. My entire mid section was on fire. I waited to get those few extra hours in or it’s completely pointless. By 9pm I was crying. By 2 am I was crying on the phone to Robb who demanded that I wake my husband up to take me to the ER. By 2:30 we were there and by 5:30am I was in my room, had had 11 vials of blood taken, started iv fluids to flush my kidneys and my first two doses of antibiotics and pain meds. Kidney infection and sepsis. I slept for two days, drugs help with that. I love this hospital because they value a patient’s need to sleep. They rarely turn the lights on, they speak in soft voices, if I wasn’t getting poked and prodded I’d probably not notice them. In fact, my husband slept like a log and complimented them!

I’m still on antibiotics and am getting a new infection already. 

But! I see my uro-gyn Wednesday to schedule surgery. Surgery!!!!!!!! What if I were fixed and normal again? Imagine that…..

Plus, I had Covid exactly one year ago and this was my first hospital stay that my oxygen stayed normal since then!!!! 

I fucked my vacation up for nothing!!! And… the cruise line changed the rule two days after they kicked me off!!!! You KNOW that’s my luck…. But! I fixed our vacation and while we won’t be on a white sand beach with a rum, we will be spending the week at The Gaylord Texan which will look like Christmas vomited all over it and I’ve booked gingerbread house decorating, sledding , snowball fights, Christmas movies, light shows and blankets with pj’s and hot cocoa waiting in our rooms when we get there! My inner child is losing her shit right now!! 

All is good. I’m happy.

Tracy

Hospital

 I haven’t been able to post because hospital WiFi. But, I’ve been here for a few days. Good times. I freaking missed Halloween!!!! 

With any luck at all I should be home anytime now.

If I were any more tired I’d be comatose !

Night