I’m NOT a pool person. Never, not even once, have I thought “ I’d like a house with a pool.” Nope. First, I don’t like deep ends. They literally take my breath away and I feel panicked. Next, I don’t like to jump or dive into a pool. Then, I don’t like to splashy splashy and I LOATHE getting splashed. You want to see me turn into a demon, splash me, I dare you. Additionally, I get bored pretty easily and pools bore me. Also, everywhere we’ve lived since Arizona has had a pool which attracts children and I no longer enjoy children. I can’t like their noise, I can’t like them being by me, I have turned into a bitchy cat lady without the cats. Lucky for me, my husband also dislikes children. To be honest, I’ve never liked kids if they weren’t my own, with the LARGE exception of my volleyball girlies. Loved their sass.
Anyway, there are rarely children in either of our pools. Bonus… And we bought these floaty thingamajigs that have an inflated tube like thing on the top and bottom and in between is mesh. Keep that in mind….
I’ve been exercising to help my mental health. It’s so fucking boring! And my left knee , that I had surgery on, 40!!!! Years ago, hurts when riding a bike. Which is total bullshit, obviously. So….
Started swimming between 3-4 days per week. It hurts nothing but my broken foot ( and my foot needs to get TF over it already) I swimmy swim swim for about 1.5-2 hours and then float around for about an hour, maybe a little more. We have two pools, one with these fountain dealios and one without. The one with it bright and sunny, the one without is surrounded by trees and cicada noises and it literally looks and sounds like you are in a Bayou. I like the sound of the flowing water so we go there. Floating in the water on these kick ass floaties calms my heart rate to 60 bpm and feels a hundred times better than therapy. I LOVE IT. I NEED IT. I CRAVE IT.
What has happened to me?
I hate getting out, even after three hours, because it calms me into a coma. Whoever goes with me( husband/son) does the same thing and we barely talk. It’s amazing.
Now, I do not lay out to tan. I’ve said this a hundred times, people who are in the sun their whole lives look like an old leather couch. I’m NOT into the look….But, as a side effect of being in the pool I am super tan… mostly.
Finally… HERE’S THE THING… I am soooo Scottish that my skin rebels against tanning, well, not all my skin, just the entire back of my legs and under my arms. So I have been laying out a bit to force a tan on those parts. Does it work? No! Wtf?! I look like I use self tanner and forget that I have the back of my legs and arms! And, I don’t turn that lovely tan color, nope, my tan is brown and red. Like a reddish brown. Wtf?! My husband looks like he’s Hispanic, I look like a blotchy red/brown WHITE AS A SHEET WHITE GIRL.
Then I moisturize until the cows come home because I don’t need the wrinkles, Baby!
My point being, I’m going to be sad when the pool closes ( probably in September) so I’m thinking about joining a club where I can swim BUT, you can’t float around and …. Fucking children. Hrmph!
It is working so well for my mental health. I’m feeling so much more human and it feels good.
That was a short story made LONG.
I got an iPhone 15 in January. I just returned it and got a new one because it was burning the shite out of me and wouldn’t charge. Apparently this is what they do. My new one is doing it too. My PSA don’t get one, I hear that the 16 is going to solve the problem. Lucky me, stuck with the brick of fire. Ouch!
No contact with my children. It’s so much easier now than when it first happened. I’m good. I’m pissed. But emotionally/ mentally, I’m good. I hardly ever cry anymore. Maybe my heart is in a steel box but if that’s what works, then good for me! It’s a weird situation. That’s the update I’ve been getting emails asking for. Nothing new, except me handling it so much better.
Miss my bear. Where are you?
Blue Moon,
Me
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